Home is where the heart is….
Real life back home…no surprise to anyone who has walked a camino how challenging that can be the first few days and even weeks. I’m so happy I have written about my journey. It will keep those memories fresh, especially the many feelings experienced along the way.
My last supper in Santiago on June 3rd was such a feast. Finally got to eat in a vegan/vegetarian restaurant called Al Porto. The food was amazing but the company even better, laughing and enjoying two bottles of Rioja with friends from New Zealand and Australia. We were five. I was afraid I would be alone my last night in Spain but the Camino provided one last time. On the way to the bus station to go to Porto, I stopped in at the Cathedral to say a prayer of thanks and light a candle as well as one last visit with Saint James.
Many times I lost faith in my capabilities along the way on those especially hard days. Somehow, unknown to me at the time, a little fire burned inside me propelling me forward. My time walking allowed me to have the most beautiful experience in my grieving process for the loss of my mother. She was with me for every step, every stumble, every single swear word
…every joyous, sad and moving moments…every flower seen and every bird heard. She was my Camino angel
.
June 2nd was my last long walk from Finistere to Muxia, 32 kms. Now at home my entire journey feels like I was in a dream. We’ve had very bad air quality my first week back with smog and smoke due to forest fires, therefore was unable to go out walking until a week later last Friday. I walked 20.7 kms and my body felt like sludge. Everything hurt except my feet, my legs felt like lead and my feet encased in cement…all this without a pack. I stopped in to a local church that I thought for sure was closed but to my surprise it was open. I was able to sit and reflect, let gratitude overcome my feelings of being uprooted and disconnected to all that was familiar to me. Read about this happening all too often on this forum so I was not surprised about going through exactly the same thing. My birthday, although celebrated with family, with many birthday wishes from friends, was very low key. I was still in the "numb" phase of transitioning from Camino life to home life.
My coffee, which I so loved before, is now tasteless and weak. I just bought a large quantity of it so until I use that up, I'm making it much stronger. Lost 12 lbs which makes me very happy. Been trying to lose 10 lbs for years lol…so…no more chips despite buying a couple of bags when I got home. Cold turkey on the potato chips would have been too cruel
. Slowly but surely life will resume at a normal beat. For now I am enjoying these next weeks off before returning to work next month.
My pack weighed 16 lbs before adding any water and snacks (so add another 2.5 lbs approx). I ended up carrying one extra pair of lightweight pants (which I ended up not really needing), two extra pairs of socks (which I did not need) and two extra pair of insoles. Rotating out the insoles was a game changer for my feet, it really helped. Despite getting blisters on my heels from one pair of insoles (which I kept and brought back home despite not using), and two small blisters in the early days on my second toes from all the sharp decline walking, my feet had no issues and once home, did not give me any "post camino" problems. Today, I have no aches and pains to speak of. I walked 95% of the time on my own and stayed 75% of the time in albergues and 25% in pensions/hotels. The three donativos I stayed in (Granon, Tosantos and Samos) were by far my most special evenings of all.
The beauty, smells and sounds I was privileged to experience are now deeply rooted in my spirit. I will draw on these feelings and images as I continue my journey in life. I saw parents with their children on this walk, some carrying them on their backs. I saw many people in their 70's and early 80's do the entire
Camino Frances which made me realize that aging is such a personal experience where what we think and do can so influence how we feel as we age.
I wish to thank all those who helped me on this forum (members, family and friends) make my own Way with your suggestions, recommendations and support. Your presence was felt and appreciated…it was as if you were with me on this incredible walk!
And of course…like many thousands before me…my walk is not done…40 days was just not enough. I decided this week that for my 70th birthday (spring of 2026) I will be back on the Camino. My goal this time is to walk Le Puy en Velay and the Frances combined, a three month, 1,600 km walk. What better way to keep me engaged in my daily life, to care for myself and stay strong and healthy…something to look forward to and a goal to achieve.
Life is fleeting…and time seems to pass much more quickly as we get older. We wonder where the time goes and our mortality looms closer as the years go by. There is nothing we can do to change that reality, but how we spend our last years on this earth, how we care for our bodies, minds and spirits are things we can still choose, if we are among the lucky who get to do that. I plan on living and dreaming and setting goals for myself for as long as I am blessed to do so.
I will throw my heart over the bar and my body will follow. Helen Keller once said: "I will not just live my life. I will not just spend my life. I will invest my life." As my own lighthouse and caretaker, doing another camino is one of the wisest investments and gifts I can give myself….
…so I'll be seeing the Camino again and bringing my mom…because home is where the heart is
and our hearts are big enough to be at many places at once
.
PS The pictures below are from my last night in Santiago and my walk at home.