Unpacking Emotions Before Camino

[manifestdestinyLISA]

Dear Pilgrim Vets & Newbies,

I have been in quite a whirlwind over the last two weeks first by attending a wedding 8 hours away in another state NY-got no sleep for two days-, then visiting relatives who just lost matriarch in another state 2 hours from there in MA- great visit-rested..then on to my family who I have not seen in over a year in NJ-parents who are aging & not well- No sleep/lots of tears..today I am completely drained/depleted emotionally after a good long cry last night and this morning- and have a friend who is very sick and awaiting my visit (2 hours away) as well as very supportive of my camino..and relatives 1.5 hours away to visit this weekend..I am leaving on Tuesday for Lourdes..I was feeling really strong, have been walking, preparing..suddenly ran out of steam and focus..having doubts as a result..and wondering how on earth I will get it all together in time.

I dont have Brierly guide- cant find here- is this a major must have for camino? Also still need to get water system worked out..and my pack weight down...need to walk for sanity & peace- has been difficult with recent travel and need rest..hopefully will rest in Lourdes & St Jean before depart...Another new pilgrm leaving the same time as me has suggested these are already camino lessons... My inspiration to walk is my parents who have not beeen well for some time..lots to sort and explore...

Need to restore and recover from all these visits and travel...any suggestions/feedback or wisdom would be appreciated...Thank You all and BUEN CAMINO...4 days til take off... :shock: Lisa

 

[grayland]

Actually, you do not need the Brierley guide before you go. It is available in SJPdP and Pamplona.
Very nice to have but not essential.

Water...don't let it worry you too much. I do not use any type of water system. I just carry two (or some days 1) 1/2 liter bottles. I fill them up along the way or buy new ones. My problem with the "water systems" is that you almost always end up carrying more weight than you really need.
1 liter of water weighs 1 kilo (2.2 pounds).
I just put a 1/2 liter bottle in my pocket so it is handy and the other in my pack.

Relax.....you are ready if you have the basics in your pack. The less you have the better. You can pick up anything you need on the way. Don't start throwing things you "might need" in your pack now. Just relax and go. It will work out very nicely.

 

[Snake]

I agree with Grayland! Going is exactly what you need. I'm taking 2- 20oz bottles. I know of and actually considered just buying 2 bottles of water and refilling them.

take the essentials, it will work itself out!

 

[wawpdx]

Lisa,
You have put much effort into thinking through your Camino planning. Right now you are experiencing a whirlwind of emotions. You have wisely built in some downtime after you arrive in Europe -- time to rest, to get over jet lag and to refocus before you start this new journey.

Here is my advice: Resist every temptation to add even one additional item to your backpack. Trust the thought that you put into this in calmer days. Do not add even one extra gram! If you truly need something you can add it later after you have mentally and physically regrouped. Give your soul time to catch up with your body and then make decisions.

Right now, just get on the plane.

Nancy

 

[MichaelB10398]

Buen Camino Lisa,
You have been through a tumult of emotional stressors in a very short period of time. Take a deep breathe and realize that the sun will still rise in the morning and life will carry on. If you are going to Lourdes, I assume that you are a person of faith. It is when trials are at our worst that our heart is most open to God and we feel his love more fully when we stretch our hands out to him.

Please understand that Lourdes is a bit of a two edged sword. It has always been a favorite place of mine, but you should be prepared to overlook the commercialization of the location. St. Bernadette is a wonderful example of someone that encountered great spiritual manifestations, but realized that it is in living each day humbly, in service to others, that her greatest work was achieved.

Do not doubt that your place is on Camino. God has your parents, your friends, and all your family in his hands, even those who don't believe in him. He is the Master of all life and cares for the sparrow as well as each of them and you.

Your job right now is to take one more step. Look for the beauty that surrounds you and be a source of peace for others. In doing so you will discover a well of peace for yourself.

May our God guide your every step and may you feel his presence always in those dark moments. Enjoy the rain and the sunshine; they are both gifts.

 

[Deleted member 3000]

Lourdes is Disneyland, but with more plastic and t-shirts.

 

[manifestdestinyLISA]

Good Morning,

Thank you everyone for support and encouragement to "Get on that Plane"! And yes, in the midst of my emotionality I have been just throwing things in my bag...the temptation is great when you are drained and not thinking practical..today I am visiting relatives and will unpack pack (literally and figuratively!) and reduce & repack...hopefully immerse myself in the ocean and get some much needed sleep tonight...I am praying for all pilgrims..and offering up my little struggles for greater good...Ultreya and hope to meet some of you along the way..thank you again for your support it really does make a difference and remind me to open my heart to what the camino wants to show me..and all pilgrims- past present & future..
These tears must be cleansing because sheesh they are many...
Buen Camino!
Lisa

 

[Tia Valeria]

Lourdes is ......

Thanks Falcon, the edit is an improvement on the original, so my comment on the post removed

 

[Tia Valeria]

Hola Lisa.
As MichaelB says God has everything and everyone in His hands. There is a saying 'Let go and let God'. So hoping you can pack and reach your first destination trusting that. Tears are healing, don't be ashamed of them
Buen Camino

 

[CaroleH]

Ah Lisa it's normal for a lot of us to feel overwhelmed with doubts and things to do during the final days. It's hard, but you will get there, and it's where you need to be.

At this stage I find it necessary to brutally prioritise, to try and let go of anything or any activity that's not absolutely necessary. It's amazing how well people, family and friends understand and accept that you may have to take a raincheck on that visit or farewell dinner. Take time to sit and relax, breathe and do some positive affirmations. This is your time. Buen camino. Carole

 

[ksam]

Ahh Lisa, Breathe...and heed the advice of the others who've posted here!! A good way to look at it, when packing is, you ain't goin into the wilderness here!! This is Spain. This is Europe. Your going from town to small town to city to village!! There are stores and people and plenty. You'll not want for anything. Truly. Know too that you are being watched over. If your still here in Jersey...go sit on one of the lovely beaches and watch the waves for a little while. Even in the middle of August, with all the people there..there is peace. Pack up that peace (and maybe a shell??) and take that with you, as well as all our wishes here for a great Camino.

Pax & Buen Camino
Karin

 

[Priscillian]

You know how it is...you put all your effort into packing for a holiday. Which clothes shall I wear? Where shall I go? Then you get there and everything changes.
So much stress for no reason!
Same here.
The Camino unwinds and unwinds YOU. Test me...you will find I am right.
The idea of "listening to the Camino" takes a while to get used to. But you will know when you have got the message. It will be when you have doubted everything, got yourself in a tizzy...and...everything turns out perfectly... Despite you!(though perhaps not you have been trying to achieve all day!)

That´s what the Camino is for!
It is an anachronism and in many ways, as "Aquarian Age as anything could posibly be.
TRhe Camino de Sangiago (for most these days I venture to state) is that contradiction in terms: a secular pilgrimage!
Trust it.
Oh, and by the way, Falcon...I don´t agree with you. Lourdes is MAGIC. Just get beyond the plastic virgins. Go and watch the men who clean the candlewax by the grotto. Feel the heat; smell gthe faith. Invite their smiles. Watch the candlelight procession from above...you will feel the power, I guarantee it. I certainly did and everybody on this Forum knows me as the Token Heretic! (and happy to be so!)
And in the same way, on the Camino...just keep your mind open and your "agenda" clear.
Miracles await you.
Tracy Saunders
http://www.pilgrimagetoheresy.comn

 

[Priscillian]

PS: About water. I have learned to be a camel. Water weighs! Mucho. Better to drink before you go and then if necessary ask someone along the way for agua. Most will fall over themselves for the chance to help a pilgrim on her way to St James ("Un abraso por el Apostol"). That doesn´t mean go empty of course, but IMO a full litre is rarely necessary unless walking in July or August.
It may mean the occsional (my mother used to say) extra "fern ticket", but hey, it´s the Camino...!

 

[manifestdestinyLISA]

Ok just returned from relative visit at the NJ beaches...walked 20 miles yesterday!! From Asbury Park NJ to Sea Girt & back..it was soooo awesome got my pack down to 14lbs...but now re packing..the ocean breeze and friendly strangers along the way help put my mind at ease...and jumping in the ocean didnt hurt either!I got this really bizarre rug burn like rash on both ankles above boot line where smart wool socks were...I have worn & washed them before...but something went wacky ...they have slight ribbing and dont think it agreed so today got some wright socks and synthetic wicking EMS socks to bring along ..not sure what caused the rash..itd pretty intense...put some cooling gel...and keepin in movin..got to get on that plane!!

BUt thank you everyone for putting everything in better perspective! Must go repack..tomorrow I depart for TOulouse France!!Then train to Lourdes!

Hope to see you along the way! Lisa

 

[dfitzg773]

Lisa, I also get a reddish rash above and below the boot area on my legs and feet when I hike. I've tried everhthing from all types of sock combinations and even changed boots, but it still comes and goes. From reading in the book "Fixing Your Feet" by John Vonhof, I believe it is Capillaritis which he decribes as "a common rash that affects the legs of athletes" and that it is a "harmless skin condition in which there are reddish-brown patches caused by leaky capillaries. As the capillaries become inflamed, tiny dots appear on the skin. The dots form into a flat red patch, which becomes brown and then slowly starts to fade awy. Its cause is unknown, but it tends to develop after exercise."

I felt better after reading this and also looked it up on the internet and got pretty much the same explanation.

 

[manifestdestinyLISA]

dfitzg773,

I can confirm that what you describe is accurate. The intense red "rug burn like" rash has now faded to light brown patch. I also think that "bunching" socks down adds to the irritation- so I switched to ankle socks that come to just over the mid boot line-feels much better all around. Thank you for sharing the explanation so atleast I know what it is!

Now, if I could just get ON the plane! Hopefully the computer crash yesterday was just another little "test" and I will be on route to France tomorrow on my rescheduled flight! I kept my pack on while standing in line for hours during United glitch. I wore the ankle wright socks-they were very comfy and I must say that my pack felt more at "one" with me!I was looking forward to the extra days in Lourdes, but now I have a little time to regroup in NJ.

Buen Camino!Lisa