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Camino Jokes

David

Veteran Member
Time of past OR future Camino
First one in 2005 from Moissac, France.
Camino jokes ....

A group of friends were walking the Camino. One day they decided to pair off in twos for the afternoon.
That evening one of them arrived late at the refugio alone, staggering under the weight of two rucksacks.
"Where's Bertram?" the other pilgrims asked.
Bertram's mate, Ronald, replied, "Bertram must have had a heart attack. He just keeled over and died a couple of miles back."
The other pilgrims gasped and then one of them asked, "You left Bertram laying out there dead and carried the rucksack here?!"
"It was a difficult decision," agreed Ronald. "But I thought that nobody would steal Bertram."
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Andy was on the Camino somewhere on the Meseta. He ran out of water and became thirsty so decided to ask at a little farmhouse for something to drink.
The old lady of the house invited him in, gave him water then invited him to sit at the kitchen table and served him a bowl of soup and bread. There was a little pig running around the kitchen, running up to Andy and giving him a great deal of attention. Andy observed and commented that he had never seen a pig this friendly.
The old woman replied, "Ah, he's not that friendly. That's his bowl you're using."
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One day three male pilgrims were walking on Camino in Galicia after three days of torrential rain. They arrived at a wide, raging river. They needed to get to the other side, but it looked impossible to ford, and they had no idea of how to do it.
The first man prayed: “Please God, give me the strength to cross this river.”
Poof! God gave him big strong arms and legs and he was able to swim across the river—though it took him 30 minutes to do it.
Seeing this, the second man prayed: “Please God, give me the strength and ability to cross this river.”
Poof! God gave him a rowboat and he was able to row across the river—though it took him 15 minutes to do it.
The third man had observed how this had worked out for his two pilgrim buddies, so he also prayed, saying, “Please God, give me the strength, ability and intelligence to cross this river.”
Poof! God turned him into a woman. He looked at the Camino map, and in a minute walked across the bridge.
 
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A holy man was on a pilgrimage to Santiago. One day he was passing through a remote rural area, seeing not a soul. As the sun was setting and he was resigning himself to a cold and hungry night in the open, he saw lights in the distance -- a farmhouse!

He made his way over and knocked on the door. After a moment the farmer answered, and seeing our holy man, immediatelt drew him inside, took his pack and cloak from his back, sat him down in the only comfortable chair in the house, in front of a roaring fire, and gave him food and drink.

That night our holy man slept in the best bed in the house. "You should get a good night's sleep," the farmer told him, "and since my wife died I don't sleep much anyway. I'll just bunk down in the kitchen."

The next morning the holy man woke feeling refreshed and invigorated. He made his way to the kitchen, where the farmer gave him breakfast and told him to relax while he put together a picnic for his lunch.

"Listen," said our holy man, "you've been wonderful. I want to do something for you in return. Now, I see your a conscientious farmer and the welfare of your animals is important to you. Let me talk to them, maybe I can found out if there's anything they're unhappy about."

The farmer is sceptical about this, but doesn't wish to offend his guest -- and a holy man at that -- so he says all the right things and the holy man goes off. A short while later he returns, and the farmer asks him if he had learned anything.

"On the whole your animals are vert happy," says our holy man, "but there were one or two things. Your cows, for instance, mentioned that your hands are itchy when you milk them."

The farmer is incredulous. "That's amazing! Yes, the mornings have been a bit cold and I've been wearing woolen gloves. But if it's making the cows unhappy, then I'll stop wearing them."

"I'm sure they'll be very happy. Next I talked to your horse. Apparently its bit has started hurting."

"I bought a new bit a few weeks ago -- that must be what's causing the pain! I'll go back to using the old one. This is wonderful stuff, thanks! So what else did you find out?"

"Well, then I went to talk to your sheep--"

"No, you shouldn't believe them!" the farmer interrupts. "They're notorious liars, every single one!"
 
...and ship it to Santiago for storage. You pick it up once in Santiago. Service offered by Casa Ivar (we use DHL for transportation).
A couple of peregrinos arrived in a small town and passed by a small church and cemetery. Inside the walls four men were carry a coffin around and around. The pair thought it strange but carried on to a bar for some light refreshment.

A couple of hours and a couple of tintos later the pair passed by again as they searched for the Albergue. The four men were still wandering around with the coffin. One of the Peregrinos said "Do you think I should go and over and give them a hand" to which the other replied "I shouldn't waste your time, I think they've just lost the plot".

Lo Siento
Mig
 
President Obama went to meet the Archbishop in Santiago.
While he was waiting, he noticed a large red payphone on the wall.
"What is the red payphone for?" President Obama asked the Archbishop.
"That is to call God." replied the Archbishop.
"Really...how much does it cost to call God?" asked President Obama.
"Only 1-Euro a minute." answered the Archbishop.
"Why is it so cheap to call God?" asked President Obama.
"Well...from Santiago calling God is a local call!" grinned the Archbishop.
 
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How do you know that a Holy Year comes to an end? All the dogs on the Camino are hoarse!
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This joke originated back in 1999 when the dogs where actually still barking furiously at pilgrims ...


Doesn't quite work like that SY - is the original in Spanish? hhhmm - would it translate more like "How do you know that a Holy Year has ended? The Camino dog is now a little horse (hoarse)"

- boom-boom!
 
The focus is on reducing the risk of failure through being well prepared. 2nd ed.
Just 2 km from Burgos a perigrino found a Penguin he carried him to town and at the first station of the guardia civil he wanted to leave him there but the police man said "take him to the Zoo please" So our pilgrim left again with his penguin. The next day the policeman saw a large group of people blocking the way of the traffic and in the middle of that group he saw the pilgrim again with his penguin. What are you doing here???? i told you to take the penguin to the Zoo he said.
Our perigrino replied. I took him yesterday to the Zoo today we going to the Cinema

Buen Camino
 
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Before completing the Camino every Pilgrim joke starts: "There were three Pilgrims in a bar..."

After completing the Camino every Pilgrim joke starts: "There were three Pilgrims hiking in the rain..."
 

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