A little lost

[Fatma]

Since back from CP my mind is only circulating on the possible next route. I find it very hard to focus on work and 'normal' life. Any experience how to 'recover' is more then welcome....

 

[Albertagirl]

Since back from CP my mind is only circulating on the possible next route. I find it very hard to focus on work and 'normal' life. Any experience how to 'recover' is more then welcome....

@Fatma:
Forget recovery, you're addicted. The only treatment is to decide on your next camino and try to limit your preparation time to when you are not at work or busy with essential family responsibilities.

 

[donalomahony]

Trouble ahead, if live Ryanair distance from Spain.

 

[Tincatinker]

Focus is for groups; normal is for Norfolk. Any attempt by the rest of existence to impose on your Camino experience should be resisted. Simply explain to anyone who will listen that you are planning your next Camino and are too busy for trivial "stuff". Check that your pack is ready and cancel the milk....

Ah, @Fatma. You might do better to ignore my advice and instead - take deep slow breaths, look at the old world around you with new eyes, look at what is special there and what needs changing. And with slow, tentative but determined steps begin that next Camino.

Buena vida

 

[Fatma]

Focus is for groups; normal is for Norfolk. Any attempt by the rest of existence to impose on your Camino experience should be resisted. Simply explain to anyone who will listen that you are planning your next Camino and are too busy for trivial "stuff". Check that your pack is ready and cancel the milk....

Ah, @Fatma. You might do better to ignore my advice and instead - take deep slow breaths, look at the old world around you with new eyes, look at what is special there and what needs changing. And with slow, tentative but determined steps begin that next Camino.

Buena vida

My eyes are just searching for yellow arrows...and my mind as well. I am in love.

 

[VNwalking]

Oh, boy, @Fatima, yeah, you're hooked.
But take heart. Your experience is pretty common--welcome to the club.
Not knowing your situation it's hard to know what to say, except that you just finished something that was probably pretty meaningful and deep and simple and alive.

For most of us there's a big difference between the Camino and what we have to do to keep life together.
We have to function in the world, and it's not possible to ditch it all to be a perennial-all-the-time-peregrinas/os. So it's a matter of integration, so that the peregrino attitude and feeling can happen all the time, not only when we're out there with a pack on our backs.
It's the 'Life Camino,' and the part of the journey that starts when we all leave Santiago.
Not so easy.
Not so pleasant all the time.
But worth it.
And kinda fun.

We long to be 'back'. But what's the difference home and the Camino? Inside, in terms of attitude--not 'out there' in terms of where we are and what we're doing. The external differences are obvious and often take the blame, but it's not them that's the source of the longing. Regular life may not be as fun, but it can be as meaningful and as real.
So where can we find the Camino feeling here and now, everywhere? And what gets in the way of that?

It's a long journey, this one. And so there's nothing wrong with wanting and planning to come back, for a 'refresher'. Nothing wrong with connecting here in this wonderful virtual albergue.
It helps to connect with people who get it.
There are so much wisdom and kindness here.
Tincatinker just nailed it:

Ah, @Fatma. You might do better to ignore my advice and instead - take deep slow breaths, look at the old world around you with new eyes, look at what is special there and what needs changing. And with slow, tentative but determined steps begin that next Camino.

Go slowly and gently. Don't rush yourself or try to fix things. They'll come back together differently by themselves. And keep looking and exploring, inside--as you begin to plan that next Camino.
Buen Camino de la Vida!

 

[William Garza]

Home...
Home?
Home.

Ohh yes..I remember.. home.

Its what you do between Caminos.
It is the time between the times
The moment before the smile
It is the wrinkle in the corner of your eye that has you look aside once in a while.

It is the Circle..within your circles
It is the space between the end..and beginning of your Caminos

 

[Fatma]

Home...
Home?
Home.

Ohh yes..I remember.. home.

Its what you do between Caminos.
It is the time between the times
The moment before the smile
It is the wrinkle in the corner of your eye that has you look aside once in a while.

It is the Circle..within your circles
It is the space between the end..and beginning of your Caminos

William thats's wonderful. Thank you!
I feel like a teenager carrying a secret in my heart. I guess I hit the road again in Sept

 

[Fatma]

Oh, boy, @Fatima, yeah, you're hooked.
But take heart. Your experience is pretty common--welcome to the club.
Not knowing your situation it's hard to know what to say, except that you just finished something that was probably pretty meaningful and deep and simple and alive.

For most of us there's a big difference between the Camino and what we have to do to keep life together.
We have to function in the world, and it's not possible to ditch it all to be a perennial-all-the-time-peregrinas/os. So it's a matter of integration, so that the peregrino attitude and feeling can happen all the time, not only when we're out there with a pack on our backs.
It's the 'Life Camino,' and the part of the journey that starts when we all leave Santiago.
Not so easy.
Not so pleasant all the time.
But worth it.
And kinda fun.

We long to be 'back'. But what's the difference home and the Camino? Inside, in terms of attitude--not 'out there' in terms of where we are and what we're doing. The external differences are obvious and often take the blame, but it's not them that's the source of the longing. Regular life may not be as fun, but it can be as meaningful and as real.
So where can we find the Camino feeling here and now, everywhere? And what gets in the way of that?

It's a long journey, this one. And so there's nothing wrong with wanting and planning to come back, for a 'refresher'. Nothing wrong with connecting here in this wonderful virtual albergue.
It helps to connect with people who get it.
There are so much wisdom and kindness here.
Tincatinker just nailed it:


Go slowly and gently. Don't rush yourself or try to fix things. They'll come back together differently by themselves. And keep looking and exploring, inside--as you begin to plan that next Camino.
Buen Camino de la Vida!

Virtual albergue

 

[VNwalking]

Yeah. And it's a good one, too.

 

[William Garza]

William thats's wonderful. Thank you!
I feel like a teenager carrying a secret in my heart. I guess I hit the road again in Sept

That Secret...
That Elegant,Eloquent silence between two who have seen
And understood the volumes of a secret language ..out there.

Its the seen soul between the weary pilgrims
Its the word composed of walking in synchronicity... With yourself

Within the Liminality of what is today
To
What you will be tommorow
What you have become.. when you turn your back to Santiago and with luminous soul, in step with so many others
That synchronicity of the numinous soul shaking joy.
The lump in your throat at the leaving
At the finding your way home.

 

[IngridF]

Home...
Home?
Home.

Ohh yes..I remember.. home.

Its what you do between Caminos.
It is the time between the times
The moment before the smile
It is the wrinkle in the corner of your eye that has you look aside once in a while.

It is the Circle..within your circles
It is the space between the end..and beginning of your Caminos

William, LOVE this one... Yup!

 

[Martha567]

Suffering from the same condition. Just started working today after my short 10-day Camino initiation.

 

[Anniesantiago]

Someone posted a funny piece today on FB about what to do if you are missing the Camino. I'll go see if I can find it.

 

[Stephen Nicholls]

I really don't now what you're all going on about.
You all sounds perfectly normal to me.

[Off to Santiago de Compostela in 48 hours ......]

 

[koilife]

Put a rubber band around your wrist. Then, every time you find yourself thinking about the Camino, just pull the band back and snap yourself.

If it helped Larry Hagman quit smoking, then it can help you break your Camino addiction . . .

 

[Wokabaut_Meri]

Virtual albergue

What a beautiful byline for this Camino Forum.

 

[Albertagirl]

I guess I hit the road again in Sept[/QUOTE

@Fatma:
Me too.

 

[Camino2010]

Since back from CP my mind is only circulating on the possible next route. I find it very hard to focus on work and 'normal' life. Any experience how to 'recover' is more then welcome....

Hello, Fatma!

As has already been said, many pilgrims would consider your experience to be quite normal.

I've walked the Camino four times and I'm going back for my fifth. There are moments in my life when dreaming and planning for the next one are my favourite things to do!

That said, you might like to search out some of the "Camino Blues" threads on the forum. There are at least a few. Some people find going back to "regular life" more challenging than others, especially after the openness and freedom that a Camino can invite and inspire. After my second Camino in particular, I had a tough time with re-entry. For the first three weeks after all of my walks, I've dreamt every night of being back on the Camino, and woken up in a strange twilight sense of not being completely there in Spain, but not fully back home again either. It's been disorienting! And totally worth it.

Keeping in touch with Camino friends helps me, and coming here to read posts is grounding and affirming. But it also helps to recognise that my Camino is NOW, in every moment (you do bring it back home with you, it gets inside you!). So in any moment during the day I can call on the Camino's wisdom and humour, resources and beauty... and doing so taps me into all those things inherent in me.

Continued Buen Camino!

Rachel

 

[gittiharre]

Home...
Home?
Home.

Ohh yes..I remember.. home.

Its what you do between Caminos.
It is the time between the times
The moment before the smile
It is the wrinkle in the corner of your eye that has you look aside once in a while.

It is the Circle..within your circles
It is the space between the end..and beginning of your Caminos

I love this! At a practical level I had my next Camino planned and pack sorted 3 months after finishing the last one. 9 more months to wait seemed endless like a pregnancy. I decided to embark on another kind of Camino which gave me day to day focus at home. I started cooking my way through the entire Rick Stein Venice to Istanbul cookbook. Off to walk the Portugues at the end of the week and I have completed 108 out of the 135 dishes. Nice distraction and the family liked it. Made up for my Camino absenteeism...Kind of.

 

[VNwalking]

Buen Camino Gitte!

But it also helps to recognise that my Camino is NOW, in every moment (you do bring it back home with you, it gets inside you!). So in any moment during the day I can call on the Camino's wisdom and humour, resources and beauty... and doing so taps me into all those things inherent in me.

Beautiful, Rachel. Love it.

 

[Fatma]

That Secret...
That Elegant,Eloquent silence between two who have seen
And understood the volumes of a secret language ..out there.

Its the seen soul between the weary pilgrims
Its the word composed of walking in synchronicity... With yourself

Within the Liminality of what is today
To
What you will be tommorow
What you have become.. when you turn your back to Santiago and with luminous soul, in step with so many others
That synchronicity of the numinous soul shaking joy.
The lump in your throat at the leaving
At the finding your way home.

Now I am having again a lump in my throat...wonderful... Thank you

 

[Fatma]

Ohhh which route u taking?

 

[Fatma]

I really don't now what you're all going on about.
You all sounds perfectly normal to me.

[Off to Santiago de Compostela in 48 hours ......]

Yeah u so relaxed since u r on ur way again :) u response doesn't count

 

[Fatma]

Suffering from the same condition. Just started working today after my short 10-day Camino initiation.

Martha it is horrible right? I mean I did not walk a month it was just ten days. I am sitting in the office and just thinking 'Hang on this is the wrong place to be!' And suddenly I have this overwhelming feeling that I carry a arrow in me...such an odd thing. I was not prepared for post adjustment problems.

 

[Fatma]

Put a rubber band around your wrist. Then, every time you find yourself thinking about the Camino, just pull the band back and snap yourself.

If it helped Larry Hagman quit smoking, then it can help you break your Camino addiction . . .

Ha ha Love that one! Will try and let u know whether it works or not.

 

[Fatma]

Hello, Fatma!

As has already been said, many pilgrims would consider your experience to be quite normal.

I've walked the Camino four times and I'm going back for my fifth. There are moments in my life when dreaming and planning for the next one are my favourite things to do!

That said, you might like to search out some of the "Camino Blues" threads on the forum. There are at least a few. Some people find going back to "regular life" more challenging than others, especially after the openness and freedom that a Camino can invite and inspire. After my second Camino in particular, I had a tough time with re-entry. For the first three weeks after all of my walks, I've dreamt every night of being back on the Camino, and woken up in a strange twilight sense of not being completely there in Spain, but not fully back home again either. It's been disorienting! And totally worth it.

Keeping in touch with Camino friends helps me, and coming here to read posts is grounding and affirming. But it also helps to recognise that my Camino is NOW, in every moment (you do bring it back home with you, it gets inside you!). So in any moment during the day I can call on the Camino's wisdom and humour, resources and beauty... and doing so taps me into all those things inherent in me.

Continued Buen Camino!

Rachel

Hi Rachel
Thank you so much for your response. I have found myself as well being more on this forum post camino.
I have been asked why the Camino feels so different then regular hiking. I don't know...why did I wander in the Swiss Alps for years but never felt this touched, moved? I always did believe in magic and this is magic. I have spoken to pilgrims mord on this forum then on my Camino I was pretty silent and choose not to speak but you feel the spirit of all the million pilgrims having put one step in in front of the other to walk their way.

Walking the Camino is on of the best things I have done in life and hopefully I will continue.

 

[Martha567]

Martha it is horrible right? I mean I did not walk a month it was just ten days. I am sitting in the office and just thinking 'Hang on this is the wrong place to be!' And suddenly I have this overwhelming feeling that I carry a arrow in me...such an odd thing. I was not prepared for post adjustment problems.

It is horrible, yes! I also walked for only 10 days, but re-entering the office this morning after being so moved by the actual experience of Camino was not easy. Also, upon entering Santiago, I was told by a more experienced pilgrims to let the emotions come and just live through it; no easy prescriptions there. Also, you'll probably laught, but some guys in our group of walkers who finished the walk around the same time as I did, planned on taking one week vacations before returning to real life. That is obviously something to consider and plan for for the next Camino.

 

[Camino2010]

Hi Rachel
Thank you so much for your response. I have found myself as well being more on this forum post camino.
I have been asked why the Camino feels so different then regular hiking. I don't know...why did I wander in the Swiss Alps for years but never felt this touched, moved? I always did believe in magic and this is magic. I have spoken to pilgrims mord on this forum then on my Camino I was pretty silent and choose not to speak but you feel the spirit of all the million pilgrims having put one step in in front of the other to walk their way.

Walking the Camino is on of the best things I have done in life and hopefully I will continue.

Yes! Going to the Camino was one of the best decisions I've ever made too.

It is magical, and for me it has something to do with walking beneath the Milky Way, literally following the path of the stars. But it's also about so very much more.

Sometimes there are no Earth words to describe these things; it's a feeling.

And when I'm there on the Way, thinking about how I'm walking on the path that thousands and thousands and thousands of pilgrims have walked before, including dear Camino friends... and then in moments when I think about how I'm also re-walking in my very own footsteps... sometimes when it feels difficult (or sometimes when it feels joyful!)... there is such grace.

For me it's a love that keeps on growing and giving.

Rachel

 

[Camino2010]

It is horrible, yes! I also walked for only 10 days, but re-entering the office this morning after being so moved by the actual experience of Camino was not easy. Also, upon entering Santiago, I was told by a more experienced pilgrims to let the emotions come and just live through it; no easy prescriptions there. Also, you'll probably laught, but some guys in our group of walkers who finished the walk around the same time as I did, planned on taking one week vacations before returning to real life. That is obviously something to consider and plan for for the next Camino.

I meant to add (as Fatma mentioned), that I wasn't prepared for how strong the Camino Blues would be for me, my first and second time I walked. But yes, as you were advised by other pilgrims, allowing whatever emotions come up to be there, helps a lot. No real sense in resisting where you are, because that's where you are (and how you're feeling) in that moment! Also, I tell people all the time who are planning to go and walk the Camino, or pilgrims I meet along the Way as I'm walking, how valuable it is to take as much time as possible at the end to ease back in to "real life". Be gentle with yourself, give yourself at least a few days if you can. That's one reason why I walk on to the coast after arriving in Santiago. First of all, my Camino ends by the ocean anyway, but also, having that time to walk the beaches in Fisterra and just BE, really helps to soothe my soul. For one thing, it's a bit jarring to get back onto a bus after 30 days (give or take) of walking, let alone get back on an airplane! I know some people have arranged their lives so that they have tight schedules, but I feel for those who finish walking the Camino on a Friday and head home to go back to work on Monday.

No laughing here!

Rachel

 

[Albertagirl]

Ohhh which route u taking?

@Fatma:
I'm not sure if this is directed at me. I will be walking the Camino d'Arles from Oloron Ste Marie to Somport Pass, the Camino Aragones from Somport to Puenta la Reina, then the rest of the Camino Frances from Puenta la Reina to Santiago de Compostella, about 900 km. in total. I leave Oloron Ste Marie on September 15th and expect to arrive in Santiago at around Nov. 7th.

 

[Felipe]

I usually have a two different "after Camino" phases. When I arrive, I hug my dear ones, tell many anecdotes, give attention to domestic and job issues, hear family news, and I can't think too much about my feelings.
Then, after many days, maybe sitting in a quiet square, in a sunset walk by the neighborhood, or even in the middle of the night, always comes an almost overcoming moment: I realize that I am no more in the Camino, that it is really in the past. It is a mix of satisfaction (I did it), relief (I came back, I am safe) but also of some sadness and nostalgy.
I discovered that writing a kind of retrospective diary, with photos, is a good therapy. I put it online (in a private document, not in a blog) and share it with family and a couple of friends. I don't know if they actually read it (I suspect that they just browse it and see the pictures) but that gives me the feeling that a chapter is finally closed...and maybe it is time to start quietly thinking about the next.

 

[Albertagirl]

In reading the posts in this thread, I think I see a pattern which corresponds to what I experienced after my camino and perhaps why I am going back, after I thought that this was a once in a lifetime experience. Before I went, I thought that those who returned were very odd. But, in my own way, I was odd, too. I was setting off on a lengthy pilgrimage to which I was certain I had been called, but with no idea what to expect. Of course, that was exactly the position I needed to be in to get the most out of it. In the course of the pilgrimage, I was blessed with various luminous spiritual experiences, which responded to my needs as an incomplete, but growing, human being. To mention just one, I was given walnuts by a generous hearted Spanish woman and that seemed to me to be a gift of provisions for my physical needs, which I could share with others, and also a promise, from the One who called me there, that He would provide for all my needs. So then I get home, the end of November, to an almost tapped out bank account and numerous end of year bills as well as charities to which I donate, all demanding attention. As a low-income senior, it was a challenge, both to balance the bank account and to incorporate this belief that my bodily needs would be met into my everyday life. Things were pretty skimpy for a while, particularly as the work that I had been counting on had been cancelled. Living in faith is not always easy, but that is what I had been called to do, with the promise that I would not be alone and that it would be doable. Living by what I learned on camino is a challenge. I think I saw a hint of this in the second part of Tinkatinker's post #4 above. So I go on. The longing to go back grows. I am not finished with this learning. I will be off again, with no definite sense of calling. But the camino is becoming for me a type of spiritual retreat. It works, as actual retreats have not done in the past, to renew my spirit, to push me towards inner growth, and to give me some directions for living when I get home. I need that, so I will go again.

 

[Camino2010]

Yes, indeed, Albertagirl.

It strengthens all my relationships.

All.

And I am thankful for this conversation!

Rachel

P.S. I always knew, before my first Camino, that I would walk it (the Camino Francés) at least twice. Some of the people I told thought that was odd... especially as I hadn't been there yet, had only seen photos and read about it. How could I know? How could I be so certain? But as soon as I arrived and set foot, I quickly came to understand my soul's wisdom. And it's been the same Camino each time, but oh so gloriously different too. I look forward to the next one!

 

[Fatma]

Yes! Going to the Camino was one of the best decisions I've ever made too.

It is magical, and for me it has something to do with walking beneath the Milky Way, literally following the path of the stars. But it's also about so very much more.

Sometimes there are no Earth words to describe these things; it's a feeling.

And when I'm there on the Way, thinking about how I'm walking on the path that thousands and thousands and thousands of pilgrims have walked before, including dear Camino friends... and then in moments when I think about how I'm also re-walking in my very own footsteps... sometimes when it feels difficult (or sometimes when it feels joyful!)... there is such grace.

For me it's a love that keeps on growing and giving.

Rachel

Ohh u did describe it wonderfully...

 

[MaryLynn]

Put a rubber band around your wrist. Then, every time you find yourself thinking about the Camino, just pull the band back and snap yourself.

If it helped Larry Hagman quit smoking, then it can help you break your Camino addiction . . .

It's the one addiction I would rather hang on to.

 

[CaminoDebrita]

Here is how I coped when I got back....I immediately began reviewing all photos.

Then, I began planning the next Camino.

My husband and friends were unreliable in terms of advice; they thought I was a little crazy for going in the first place, but boy were they proud! ("my wife just walked 500 miles through Spain...I don't know why...she just wanted to...etc)

I first decided to plan a trip for myself with the husband, but he only wanted to go to Scotland and England. I used all the money I had in savings and bought those tickets. That trip will be in August.

Next, I figured out that I had three weeks of free time in March and the first week of April, so I found a cheap ticket, and flew out---just four months after returning from being gone for six weeks. My March trip--from Burgos to SdC---was fast and interesting.

My next trip--to Scotland--will be walking the West Highland Way. I will say that I spend nearly all of my extra income on travels.

Buen Camino!

 

[SYates]

Planing the next Camino helps.
Getting involved with a local pilgrims association/chapter and helping others planning their next Camino also helps.
Doing some volunteering work and putting in action what you have learned during your Camino also helps.
But the bad message is there is no cure for the Camino Virus, just some ways to treat the symptoms.
Buen Camino, SY

 

[Teadrinker41]

My husband and I walked the Camino Francis last year may/june. I can't get it out of my head either. Recently I went and did some voluntary work in Papua New Guinea and found this (there were no others around) at the first place we stayed in Port Morseby. I had been wondering if I was doing the 'right thing'..Guess I found the right place! Currently planning another Camino

 

[Normieni]

Hi Fatma,
I got back from the Caminho Portugues 1 week ago, and this book helps me a lot to carry the Silence and Mystical Sense of the Caminho in my daily life.
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0044CIZX4/?tag=casaivar02-20
All the best!

 

[Fatma]

Hi Fatma,
I got back from the Caminho Portugues 1 week ago, and this book helps me a lot to carry the Silence and Mystical Sense of the Caminho in my daily life.
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0044CIZX4/?tag=casaivar02-20
All the best!

TNH is great! Thanks a lot of reminding me.

 

[Wokabaut_Meri]

Hi Fatma,
I got back from the Caminho Portugues 1 week ago, and this book helps me a lot to carry the Silence and Mystical Sense of the Caminho in my daily life.
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0044CIZX4/?tag=casaivar02-20
All the best!

One of my favourite teachers whose books taught me Walking Meditation. You might also like his illustrated book Walking Meditation: Peace is Every Step. It Turns the Endless Path to Joy co-authored along with one of his principle students, Nguyen Anh-Huong.

Walking Meditation
Take my hand
We will walk
We will only walk
We will enjoy our walk
Without thinking of arriving anywhere
Walk peacefully
Walk happily...

 

[Stephen Nicholls]

I t

Put a rubber band around your wrist. Then, every time you find yourself thinking about the Camino, just pull the band back and snap yourself.

If it helped Larry Hagman quit smoking, then it can help you break your Camino addiction . . .

I tried that. Each time I snapped the band I checked out flights to Spain ....

 

[Robo]

Also, you'll probably laugh but some guys in our group of walkers who finished the walk around the same time as I did, planned on taking one week vacations before returning to real life. That is obviously something to consider and plan for for the next Camino.

I've tried that, both times. Doesn't work. I just spend all my time here

I think it is far more healthy and being honest with yourself to just accept that you need a little time back at work and at home 'between' Caminos.

After all, planning the Next one, refining your gear, catching up on this Forum..... It all takes time! And shouldn't be rushed.......

Another benefit of this 'inter Camino' down time is that you might do a bit of work to replenish your Camino funds.....

I just worked out in my head, that if I retire tomorrow, my pension would just be adequate enough to fund 'living on the Camino' . Hmmmm a full time Pilgrim? How many different routes are there?

How do I broach this with Pat? "Sweetheart......you know how you keep telling me to lose weight and get fit"?