Is it okay to want to walk the Frances alone?

[Viva Terlingua]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

 

[nidarosa]

Selfish? Not at all! And even if it is, who are you hurting or harming with this 'selfish' decision? I love walking on my own, for all the reasons you mention. I love meeting new people, which is harder if you are already with someone, because others might think you prefer your own company. I sometimes prefer walking in silence, other times I enjoy chatting all day, sometimes I want to walk fast and sometimes slow, and sometimes I decide on the spur of the moment to stop for the day just because the restaurant across the street has got pork cheeks on the menu. Some people think it is strange that I prefer to walk alone, and that I prefer to carry my (lightweight) pack instead of forwarding it, but I love it because it gives me so much freedom and flexibility to follow my own heart and mind. Selfish is such a negatively loaded word, how about telling them that you are giving yourself some time and space? That is after all what you are doing. Call it self-care, not selfish. Buen camino to you!

 

[peregrina2000]

Did you know when you posted this that I had just gotten on the forum and was perusing the “new topics” list? This question is like a set-up for me to begin a long rant.

I have walked with others and by myself, but the times I walk with others I often pull off by myself, and the times I walk by myself, I frequently walk stints with others. So for me these are not two rigid categories.

Like @nidarosa, I don’t think selfishness has anything to do with it. It‘s just a preference about how you approach your precious time on the camino. It’s also a good way to limit the artificial demands that would come from the wishes/plans of the people you are walking with. Many of the unhappy people I’ve seen on the camino are those who had an agreement to “walk with” someone, be it a spouse, a friend, someone met on the internet, and then a few days in, that person discovered that this was a bad match. Lots of people walk happily together, I’m not saying that it’s a bad idea, but if you don’t want to do it it is a bad idea. Instead of being selfish, you are sparing someone the tension of having a partner who doesn’t want to be their partner.

I have a lot of restrictions on my camino time, which come not from the camino, but from responsibilities at home. So for me, it is so important to make sure that there is not an additional layer of responsibilities added on once I arrive in Spain. This year I hope to start out with a camino buddy in Alicante, but he knows my situation and knows I will be doing my own thing. We start out alone in the morning, usually coincide in a bar/café along the way, and agree on where we will spend the night. But we both know that we are not committed to anything other than meeting up in Alicante and seeing how things go as we set out on the Lana.

Long way of saying that you should in no way feel guilty about wanting to go it on your own. And in fact, if you really want to try some solo walking, you should consider some of the less traveled caminos, maybe the Vdlp for starters. Or at least, when you get to Ponferrada on the Francés, consider veering south to take the glorious Camino de Invierno into Santiago. So many options for those who are not dissuaded by the thought of walking alone and who in fact love it. Buen camino, Laurie

 

[Stroller]

Absolutely nothing wrong with walking alone, you will get enough company at your daily destination. There are those who recharge in others company, extroverts, and those who recharge alone, introverts and there is nothing wrong with either sort.

By the way you don't want to walk with this lady:

Jane from California

I am at peace enjoying the solitude, a warm day and a gentle pace. No hurry, it’s a short stage, a day to enjoy and savour. Then, suddenly, Jane from California appears. She matches my pace and starts to talk about “the deep state” followed by the “dangers of contrails”, “microwaves”, “fake vaccinations”, “fake moon landings’, the “Kennedy assassination conspiracy”. The tedium increases, I speed up, she matches me still talking, unstoppable, relentless. I stop for a pee, she waits. I slow down, she slows down. How do I loose her and regain my day? She moves seamlessly to the “Illuminati” followed by “UFO’s” and what she calls “the Roswell Conspiracy” and on and on. Prattling and babbIing she does not stop. What the hell do I do now? A village comes and goes, no chance enjoy it. The next appears, it has a bar and I need coffee. Outside the bar is Alice, a friend of Jane’s. Someone help me here there could be two of them now. Much Hi’ing, much hugging, much cheek kissing and she stops to talk with Alice. Thank you God. I walk on as fast as possible, desperate for coffee, find a bar off the route and hide. The camino has given me another lesson.

 

[peregrina2000]

She matches my pace and starts to talk about “the deep state” followed by the “dangers of contrails”

I knew nothing about contrails till I spent the night in the lovely albergue in Arrés on the Aragonés, where the hospitalero took us all to a great viewing spot for the sunset and proceeded to tell us all about them. Maybe people who believe in contrails are drawn to the Camino. Sorry, off-topic, I know.

BTW, I got a tip from an iconic Camino forum member, who advises that the best way to keep people from bothering you when you are walking is to carry rosary beads and mumble to yourself.

 

[Viva Terlingua]

So for me, it is so important to make sure that there is not an additional layer of responsibilities added on once I arrive in Spain.

That's the part I'm looking forward to, no responsibilities other than putting one foot in front of the other.

 

[FRM]

I definitely fall into @peregrina2000 ’s camp. A lot depends on my mood any given day (or mile). I too have had friends ask about coming with me. For the few who appeared serious I have made it clear that I wouldn’t want to walk with them or anyone else everyday, but would be happy to travel with them to Spain and get them started. If our paces are similar we could walk together some days and otherwise could meet up in the evenings. I realize at this point you are wondering if and why I have any friends… The Camino is a very personal journey for me, so yes I am ”selfish”. I will also note that trying walk with someone with a different pace has resulted in a couple of injuries. Your body has a speed which best suits it for the rigors of mile after mile, day after day.

Best,
frm

 

[Kitsambler]

People at home try to shame you about walking alone because they are uncomfortable with the idea and are projecting onto you. Friends who want to come with you just need a little encouragement and a nudge ... not a 24/7 escort. Some of the people you meet along the way are good companions, some are not - much like life. Breaking up can be hard to do!

 

[legless]

I find that people that don't "walk" find the idea of walking alone strange, or unsafe. Everyone apart from walking friends is surprised when they ask who i'm going with and I tell them no-one. I always walk long distance trails alone, a key reason being if I get lost I can't spend time being irritated with anyone else but myself! I walk to sort my head out, giving myself a good talking to and spending time looking at the things I want to see. My head needs a lot of sorting out since I was widowed, so I'm going for a REALLY long walk, anticipating that I'll match step with others at times but generally I'll be walking alone.

 

[malingerer]

Absolutely nothing wrong with walking alone, you will get enough company at your daily destination. There are those who recharge in others company, extroverts, and those who recharge alone, introverts and there is nothing wrong with either sort.

By the way you don't want to walk with this lady:

Jane from California

I am at peace enjoying the solitude, a warm day and a gentle pace. No hurry, it’s a short stage, a day to enjoy and savour. Then, suddenly, Jane from California appears. She matches my pace and starts to talk about “the deep state” followed by the “dangers of contrails”, “microwaves”, “fake vaccinations”, “fake moon landings’, the “Kennedy assassination conspiracy”. The tedium increases, I speed up, she matches me still talking, unstoppable, relentless. I stop for a pee, she waits. I slow down, she slows down. How do I loose her and regain my day? She moves seamlessly to the “Illuminati” followed by “UFO’s” and what she calls “the Roswell Conspiracy” and on and on. Prattling and babbIing she does not stop. What the hell do I do now? A village comes and goes, no chance enjoy it. The next appears, it has a bar and I need coffee. Outside the bar is Alice, a friend of Jane’s. Someone help me here there could be two of them now. Much Hi’ing, much hugging, much cheek kissing and she stops to talk with Alice. Thank you God. I walk on as fast as possible, desperate for coffee, find a bar off the route and hide. The camino has given me another lesson.

I love this

Samarkand.

 

[Former member 91017]

Absolutely nothing wrong with walking alone, you will get enough company at your daily destination. There are those who recharge in others company, extroverts, and those who recharge alone, introverts and there is nothing wrong with either sort.

By the way you don't want to walk with this lady:

Jane from California

I am at peace enjoying the solitude, a warm day and a gentle pace. No hurry, it’s a short stage, a day to enjoy and savour. Then, suddenly, Jane from California appears. She matches my pace and starts to talk about “the deep state” followed by the “dangers of contrails”, “microwaves”, “fake vaccinations”, “fake moon landings’, the “Kennedy assassination conspiracy”. The tedium increases, I speed up, she matches me still talking, unstoppable, relentless. I stop for a pee, she waits. I slow down, she slows down. How do I loose her and regain my day? She moves seamlessly to the “Illuminati” followed by “UFO’s” and what she calls “the Roswell Conspiracy” and on and on. Prattling and babbIing she does not stop. What the hell do I do now? A village comes and goes, no chance enjoy it. The next appears, it has a bar and I need coffee. Outside the bar is Alice, a friend of Jane’s. Someone help me here there could be two of them now. Much Hi’ing, much hugging, much cheek kissing and she stops to talk with Alice. Thank you God. I walk on as fast as possible, desperate for coffee, find a bar off the route and hide. The camino has given me another lesson.

Part of me wants to say "Camino accepts all kinds..." and just "Buen Camino!" that stuff... But part of me feels so, so, so sorry that you seem to have fallen accidentally into the company of my brother in female form. Eep.

 

[Former member 91017]

To be honest, until I arrived at the Biarritz station and saw groups arriving together, it never occurred to me that anyone would walk *other than alone*.
Whether I wanted it or not, I did make friends on my first... some from whom I eventually walked on, one of whom remains a very close friend.
On my second it was a matter of taking a rare opportunity to get away with my spouse, so he took 3 weeks alone, and then we met mid-way and walked for 19 days together. Restorative that was.
My 3rd walk was from Coimbra and I walked alone every day but socialized with others at cafes and in evenings. Perfect mix for me. And I remain close to one person from that walk, in regular casual contact with another.
Hoping to be on the Norte in April... I intend as always to walk alone... and then to go with whatever the camino brings my way (as long as it is good), and to walk away from what is nonsense...
I wish you a very good camino.

 

[trecile]

, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay.

This is exactly why I love going on Camino alone! In fact it's why I like to go on walks and hikes alone at home too.
At home I usually go on a 5-7 mile walk every day. At the beginning of the pandemic I suddenly had friends who wanted to join me as a "safe" way to socialize. I did enjoy their company, but found that I was really missing my solo walks. Now I limit my walks with friends to 2 to 3 times a week.

BTW, I got a tip from an iconic Camino forum member, who advises that the best way to keep people from bothering you when you are walking is to carry rosary beads and mumble to yourself.

Or maybe start talking about contrails, the Illuminati, or the fake moon landing?

 

[VNwalking]

Am I being selfish?

God, no.
Walk your solo camino without apology.
And buen camino!

Jane from California

I don't know whether to laugh or express compassion. Just...OMG, both.

BTW, I got a tip from an iconic Camino forum member, who advises that the best way to keep people from bothering you when you are walking is to carry rosary beads and mumble to yourself.

 

[TAF]

Nothing at all wrong with that. I am hoping to walk solo later this year, a plan postponed from 2020. I like to please myself where to stop,eat,spend time and set my own walking pace. It doesn’t matter what other people think, do what you want to do. Buen Camino

 

[Anthony18]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

I don't think you're being selfish at all. I thru-hiked the CF alone. Best thing I ever did. Walked at my pace, took my time to snap some photographs, stopped at some picturesque town(s) or on a patch of grass-snacked on a sandwiches or whatever and took everything in. No pressure to do as others do. That freedom of doing what I want, when I want and how I want is the BEST! Nothing wrong with hiking along side of others and shooting the breeze, which one does from time to time, but I always enjoyed the sound of the wind and the crunch of gravel beneath my feet. The solitude that the CF or any other long distance hike offers is one of the things that I find most appealing.

 

[simply B]

"Anything wrong with wanting to walk alone?"

No. Anyone who says differently is, in a word, wrong.

Carry on.

Buen Camino!

B

 

[Anniesantiago]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

You are not alone.
I often find myself enjoying my own company - more and more as I age.
I prefer to walk solo for the same reasons you state - when I want to stop, I want to STOP.
I also don't especially love constant chatter. I enjoy hearing nature.
So yeah, just be grumpy It's ok!

 

[RJM]

No, why even ask?
I too get the same question when I talk about walking the Camino to those who have never walked it or know much about it. "You went alone?". I get that question because walking the Camino is unique in the realm of trips. Holidays. Vacations. As a whole people do not recreational travel alone. I suppose those same people who feel the need to be around others 24/7 have issues when they don't develop a "Camino family" or go an entire day on the Camino walking alone.

 

[CAJohn]

In the past, I might have wondered about how to respond politely to a conspiracy nut, but no longer. If faced with "Jane from California" today, I would tell Jane that I am so exhausted from dealing with conspiracy theorists that I am forced to deal with in my professional life, that I cannot and will not put up with them in my private life. Good day and Buen Camino.

 

[Former member 95219]

Personally I love walking alone. You can escape with your thoughts. I tend to find you meet the same people at your destination each night so you do make relationships and bond just as much as if you walk together! You will have more stories to share.

In reality walking with others, especially in small groups, will inevitably lead to some stress/ compromise too which makes things tough!

 

[David]

Go alone - go alone - go alone - go alone - go alone!

If you go alone you make all of your own decisions, without one negotiation, you turn inwards into your vast mind and outwards to others - and, you are there, on Camino, facing whatever happens.

also, you will meet many people and flow into and out of their lives, as they will with you - a 500 mile slow dance.

Go with someone else and everything has to be negotiated, you turn inwards, sit and eat only together and worse, talk about what Steve or Sue are doing to their kitchen or bathroom back home - you aren't 'there' - and you never get the chance to turn inwards into your internal spaces.

So I would suggest, very gently - GO ALONE!!! (oh, and switch that phone off too!!)

This, from Pilgrim House in Santiago, sums up why to walk alone completely -

 

[Tassie Kaz]

Thank you for raising this topic @Viva Terlingua. Obviously many walkers here on the Forum 'get it'. If only the wider world did too...

 

[Former member 99290]

Go with someone else and everything has to be negotiated, you turn inwards, sit and eat only together and worse, talk about what Steve or Sue are doing to their kitchen or bathroom back home - you aren't 'there' - and you never get the chance to turn inwards into your internal spaces.

My first camino from SJPP to Finisterre was solo and I’m very happy it was. Since then I’ve walked solo, with a dear friend (twice), and with my husband (many times). All wonderful experiences, inside and out!

I disagree with David’s statement. That may be so for some - I'm sure not all - and that has not been my experience. I’ve never felt joined at the hip with either my friend or my husband, nor they me. And I don’t recall any kitchen renovation banter. Mostly we are each walking with our own thoughts.

Like all other commenters, I’d say ‘There is nothing wrong with wanting to walk alone. And it’s wonderful.’

As can be walking with another person - it really comes down to choosing wisely.

 

[Fred2a]

What a relief to walk alone !!!!
I couldn’t imagine walking a camino another way. I enjoyed meeting fellow pilgrims in the evening but in the morning I was just like waking up, packing, hitting the road without talking to anybody or giving any explanation about my plans for the day.
I didn’t want any tie, just be free to do whatever I want.
Just walking. Thinking. Then I have a solo beer on arrival. Then time to socialise !!

 

[simply B]

My first camino from SJPP to Finisterre was solo and I’m very happy it was. Since then I’ve walked solo, with a dear friend (twice), and with my husband (many times). All wonderful experiences, inside and out!

I disagree with David’s statement. That may be so for some - I'm sure not all - and that has not been my experience. I’ve never felt joined at the hip with either my friend or my husband, nor they me. And I don’t recall any kitchen renovation banter. Mostly we are each walking with our own thoughts.

Like all other commenters, I’d say ‘There is nothing wrong with wanting to walk alone. And it’s wonderful.’

As can be walking with another person - it really comes down to choosing wisely.

A nicely 'finessed' answer because you note ".... it really comes down to choosing wisely."

In the interest of full disclosure, I have twice walked with a companion (a friend of 40+ years) who needed help to accomplish the goal. Once from SJPP to Finisterre/Muxia and again from SJPP to Pamplona. His Camino ended there as he suffered an injury. After some light duty days around Santo Domingo de Silos and then Burgos, it was apparent that I had to get him home as healing was not progressing.

Our walking together was a success simply because we had some "rules":

- we would be companionable but allow each other most of the day to be alone or sociable as needs be.

- we would look out for each other at every stop to re-establish connection.

- any decision regarding albergue would have to be mutually agreeable... if one of us had intuition against a stay then we would move on.

- we split chores of shopping, laundry, pharmacy runs.

- no arguments... we'd agree to disagree and that would be it.

- the first seven days were to be a grace period for us to get used to each other's walking style and we'd refine the "rules" from there.

I had formulated this approach from a thread on the matter. Here is a link:

https://www.caminodesantiago.me/community/threads/what-issues-arise-when-walking-with-a-companion.11101/

BUT, I still prefer to walk alone.

B

 

[Former member 99290]

A nicely 'finessed' answer because you note ".... it really comes down to choosing wisely."

'finessed'? I was just contributing my experience. And that walking with others is not necessarily the experience that David described.

 

[La Brique Jaune]

Hi

By walking alone, the thoughts are free to go anywhere they want to go, they are not distracted by a conversation. But walking with one person can give us new perspective about life or a new input.

Also It's great when people at home understand a pilgrim is not in the mood of writing about his day.
I walked the Frances during July-August even in that time I was alone most of the time by walking slow (not by choice) and by skipping the crowded albergues.

A Camino is a lot efforts: Taking a 10 hours flight, taking a break of work/family/obligations
walk 5 weeks outside we do it because it's a personal experience, like maybe a therapy, and not a selfish experience.

I'm surely grumpy and I liked to walk alone.

 

[Robo]

Walk alone.......

It's a very personal journey.

Anyone asking to join you, and piggy back your Camino is being selfish

...

 

[Robo]

Absolutely nothing wrong with walking alone, you will get enough company at your daily destination. There are those who recharge in others company, extroverts, and those who recharge alone, introverts and there is nothing wrong with either sort.

By the way you don't want to walk with this lady:

Jane from California

I am at peace enjoying the solitude, a warm day and a gentle pace. No hurry, it’s a short stage, a day to enjoy and savour. Then, suddenly, Jane from California appears. She matches my pace and starts to talk about “the deep state” followed by the “dangers of contrails”, “microwaves”, “fake vaccinations”, “fake moon landings’, the “Kennedy assassination conspiracy”. The tedium increases, I speed up, she matches me still talking, unstoppable, relentless. I stop for a pee, she waits. I slow down, she slows down. How do I loose her and regain my day? She moves seamlessly to the “Illuminati” followed by “UFO’s” and what she calls “the Roswell Conspiracy” and on and on. Prattling and babbIing she does not stop. What the hell do I do now? A village comes and goes, no chance enjoy it. The next appears, it has a bar and I need coffee. Outside the bar is Alice, a friend of Jane’s. Someone help me here there could be two of them now. Much Hi’ing, much hugging, much cheek kissing and she stops to talk with Alice. Thank you God. I walk on as fast as possible, desperate for coffee, find a bar off the route and hide. The camino has given me another lesson.

You have more patience than I do!

It has only happened to me once, and within a few minutes I just made my apologies, saying that I wanted to walk alone today.

Actually it might have been 30 seconds!

..

 

[Aloha From Kauai]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

I'm with you! I get the incredulous looks and "you shouldn't go by yourself!"
I will relish my alone time, and will be thrilled meeting new people, but fully prefer to go on my own.
Here's to personal freedom, lol!

 

[RJM]

Absolutely nothing wrong with walking alone, you will get enough company at your daily destination. There are those who recharge in others company, extroverts, and those who recharge alone, introverts and there is nothing wrong with either sort.

By the way you don't want to walk with this lady:

Jane from California

I am at peace enjoying the solitude, a warm day and a gentle pace. No hurry, it’s a short stage, a day to enjoy and savour. Then, suddenly, Jane from California appears. She matches my pace and starts to talk about “the deep state” followed by the “dangers of contrails”, “microwaves”, “fake vaccinations”, “fake moon landings’, the “Kennedy assassination conspiracy”. The tedium increases, I speed up, she matches me still talking, unstoppable, relentless. I stop for a pee, she waits. I slow down, she slows down. How do I loose her and regain my day? She moves seamlessly to the “Illuminati” followed by “UFO’s” and what she calls “the Roswell Conspiracy” and on and on. Prattling and babbIing she does not stop. What the hell do I do now? A village comes and goes, no chance enjoy it. The next appears, it has a bar and I need coffee. Outside the bar is Alice, a friend of Jane’s. Someone help me here there could be two of them now. Much Hi’ing, much hugging, much cheek kissing and she stops to talk with Alice. Thank you God. I walk on as fast as possible, desperate for coffee, find a bar off the route and hide. The camino has given me another lesson.

What an odd story. Why didn't you just excuse yourself and tell her you prefer to walk alone? I have done that many times on the Camino. People understand. Also how did the subject of the Apollo 11 mission and JFK come up in the first place?

 

[trecile]

I will relish my alone time,

You will!

 

[simply B]

'finessed'? I was just contributing my experience. And that walking with others is not necessarily the experience that David described.

@jenny@zen -

It seems that I may have caused some offense which was certainly NOT intended! Apologies sincerely offered...

Mine was an attempt (apparently, poorly done) to support your proposition that walking well with a companion CAN be done. However, as you noted "choosing wisely" is the key.

B

 

[Lisa HS]

BTW, I got a tip from an iconic Camino forum member, who advises that the best way to keep people from bothering you when you are walking is to carry rosary beads and mumble to yourself.

If you skip the rosary beads and just mumble to yourself with no apparent excuse, while looking at your fingers...wouldn't that actually work better?

 

[Pilgrim9]

"Anything wrong with wanting to walk alone?"

Absolutely not.

 

[Aloha From Kauai]

Absolutely nothing wrong with walking alone, you will get enough company at your daily destination. There are those who recharge in others company, extroverts, and those who recharge alone, introverts and there is nothing wrong with either sort.

By the way you don't want to walk with this lady:

Jane from California

I am at peace enjoying the solitude, a warm day and a gentle pace. No hurry, it’s a short stage, a day to enjoy and savour. Then, suddenly, Jane from California appears. She matches my pace and starts to talk about “the deep state” followed by the “dangers of contrails”, “microwaves”, “fake vaccinations”, “fake moon landings’, the “Kennedy assassination conspiracy”. The tedium increases, I speed up, she matches me still talking, unstoppable, relentless. I stop for a pee, she waits. I slow down, she slows down. How do I loose her and regain my day? She moves seamlessly to the “Illuminati” followed by “UFO’s” and what she calls “the Roswell Conspiracy” and on and on. Prattling and babbIing she does not stop. What the hell do I do now? A village comes and goes, no chance enjoy it. The next appears, it has a bar and I need coffee. Outside the bar is Alice, a friend of Jane’s. Someone help me here there could be two of them now. Much Hi’ing, much hugging, much cheek kissing and she stops to talk with Alice. Thank you God. I walk on as fast as possible, desperate for coffee, find a bar off the route and hide. The camino has given me another lesson.

You are profoundly more patient than I!

 

[Aloha From Kauai]

If you skip the rosary beads and just mumble to yourself with no apparent excuse, while looking at your fingers...wouldn't that actually work better?

Except the rosary would give the off ramp back to not-scary in case you met someone you actually would like to get know

 

[Former member 99290]

@jenny@zen -

It seems that I may have caused some offense which was certainly NOT intended! Apologies sincerely offered...

Mine was an attempt (apparently, poorly done) to support your proposition that walking well with a companion CAN be done. However, as you noted "choosing wisely" is the key.

B

Hi B . I didn’t get the comment about the finessed response - but nor was I offended.

I’d say on reflection that my words about choosing wisely if contemplating walking a Camino with someone is a pretty obvious suggestion. but it still doesn’t work out for some.

I was fortunate enough to be ‘chosen’ by a dear friend who, after hearing about my first Camino experience, wanted to walk the Camino Frances but didn’t want to walk alone. I was honoured and thrilled to walk with her. Six years later she asked me again. Both were joyful experiences. And in the meantime she also walked alone.

There are not many people I would do that with. Just my dear friend and my dear husband. Wise choices as buddies on the Camino and in life

 

[Dani7]

Any long walk you choose to make whether a Camino or locally is about listening to your heart and your needs. Do what feels right for you and others around you will do the same. Choosing to respect your needs is not selfish, it’s self love

Buen Camino

 

[natefaith]

That's the part I'm looking forward to, no responsibilities other than putting one foot in front of the other.

Thanks for bringing up a great discussion.

And it sounds like you are hungry to go alone, so like many others here I'd recommend you go alone and protect that solo Camino. And enjoy it.

Buen Camino.

 

[Bradypus]

If you skip the rosary beads and just mumble to yourself with no apparent excuse, while looking at your fingers...wouldn't that actually work better?

Probably doesn't work so well nowadays. When someone wandered down the road mumbling to themselves we used to think "alcohol" or "drugs" or "mental illness". These days the diagnosis is probably "Bluetooth"

 

[Kathor1]

I don't own a rosary and don't pray the rosary and would feel uncomfortable pretending to do so but this has given me an idea: ear pods! I don't listen to music or audiobooks while walking but I would have no qualms about pretending to do so. Great idea!

I'm a section walker (1-3 weeks at a time) and like you, @Viva Terlingua, people I barely knew offered to go with me "the next time" when I talked about my project of walking to Santiago. I smiled politely and did not take up their offer.

I've done all versions: walked by myself (mostly), walked with an ad-hoc group that had formed on the way (for a few days), walked with a close family member, walked with a group of friends. All good experiences. And no, we didn't talk about trivial things back home. It was an occasion to talk about other things, or even talk about and talk through personal problems (mine or the other person's) for which you don't always have the time back home. No epiphanies and no solutions were found or offered by The Way, it had just been good to talk.

Bottom line: You don't have to take anyone with you if you don't want to. Rave about the benefits of walking alone or even tell them that that's the way the Camino is done. They then may want to go on their own, too . You know of course why they want to accompany you: they are unsure or even afraid of going alone. Educate them. Buen Camino!

 

[David Tallan]

I'm with those who say there is no harm nor foul in saying to someone that, at this point in your Camino, you would prefer to walk alone. No need for acting with rosary beads or ear buds that you aren't really using as you are pretending to. For me, I might worry that the latter courses of action would affect the authenticity I try and practice on the Camino.

I find that for me, connections with other pilgrims are one of the joys of the Camino and the OP mentions getting these during breaks, at the destination, and occasionally during walks. But even if the OP preferred solitude at all times, that would be a perfectly valid choice.

 

[Kathor1]

For me, I might worry that the latter courses of action would affect the authenticity I try and practice on the Camino.

And for me, I might consider it as an opportunity for others to practice being non-judgmental when they see me with my ear pods (which, btw, I would still have to buy because I don't own these either).

 

[David Tallan]

And for me, I might consider it as an opportunity for others to practice being non-judgmental when they see me with my ear pods (which, btw, I would still have to buy because I don't own these either).

I'm not meaning to judge those who use them, either as intended or in this fashion. That's why I prefaced my statement with "for me". For others, their choices for themselves are perfectly valid.

 

[Sweetbaboo]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

My first Camino was solo. One friend really wanted to go with me and I said no with the reason that it would become "our" trip instead of mine. I met many people, walked with some, walked alone but the best part was walking at my own pace. You will find that most pilgrims "get it" when it comes to how you wish to do your Camino. I have walked two more Caminos, one with a couple and one with a friend. All were good. Enjoy
Buen Camino

 

[LTfit]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

Totally agree!

It's almost always non-Camino acquaintances that are surprised when I say that I usually walk alone. Most Camino walkers I know (if not all) understand this and my good friends and family get it totally after my 10 years walking Caminos.

As you say, joining someone for a drink or meal is nice but I much prefer walking at my own pace and distance. And since long stages are my preference when walking alone, there are few that want to join me
I guess I scare people off

 

[Rick Chollett]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

I went by myself when I did it. And you are never truly alone unless you make an effort to do so. There are so many others walking as well. As for anything "wrong" with it; absolutely not!

 

[VNwalking]

I guess I scare people

Not you, @LTfit. But those epic distances? Yeah. definitely scary.

 

[SacredSteps]

Some of my favorite moments of the Camino (and all of my pilgrimages, really) are the solitary moments to reflect, dream, and talk (to myself and God).

 

[Bumpa]

Breaking away from a "Jane from California" who has latched onto you may be as simple as Not showering or washing your clothes for a few days.

 

[bearwithme]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

I walked alone in 2017 and enjoyed every minute of it. More freedom to enjoy the sights without someone saying we need to move along.

 

[Gadflyparexcellence]

Walking solo or not depends on the state of mind of each and every peregrino. For those desiring solitude walking alone would be the perfect way to accomplish it.

For those who might like to rekindle their relationships walking with another person might be the perfect solution. During one of my walks, I befriended an Italian doctor and his daughter who got reunited on the Camino after having been estranged from each other for several years.

There would still be others who might like to share the joy of walking the Camino with their near or dear ones.

 

[Mar W]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

Viva Terlingua you have just accurately described how I feel about walking the Camino .. some people think I am very strange but the Camino is MY time for ME ? I have nobody to worry about but myself and I too love to talk to people both along the route and when I stop but only when I feel like it.
It's heartening to read exactly what I would write myself

 

[Flyguy]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

I have done 3Caminos,always alone and love the freedom to stop when and where I want and walk at my own pace.

 

[Stephen S]

Breaking away from a "Jane from California" who has latched onto you may be as simple as Not showering or washing your clothes for a few days.

Glad you didn't use that strategy when I joined you for part of the way in 2018!

 

[Shalaw]

Most people walk alone, and part of the beauty of the Camino is that once you're there and meet others, you can choose to walk with others or walk alone, depending how you feel each day. When I walked Camino Frances in 2015, I walked with my partner and in my experience, less people approach you when you're with someone else. It's not selfish to walk alone.

 

[JamesVT]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

I found that being an older, extraordinarily slow walker meant that I was able to have a lot of time alone on the Camino without having to worry about strategies for having some solitude. I usually had some quick, refreshing conversation that cured my momentary loneliness, and then we said our goodbyes. After that I returned to my solitary looking and thinking (or not thinking) as I trekked on by myself.

 

[Bumpa]

Glad you didn't use that strategy when I joined you for part of the way in 2018!

You know that I hung on your every word Steve

 

[lunna]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

It’s the best way to go!

 

[Former member 59618]

The ONLY way I can walk is alone. Not weird at all. My social times are coffee/meal stops and dinner time.

 

[Vince Rollason]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

Hi.
When I walked my first Camino my son was due to come with me but some work problems meant he had to pull out at the last minute. I decided to carry on and go alone. He flew out to Santiago to spend a week with me at the end. The first thing I said to him on arrival was "don't take this the wrong way but I am glad you didn't come". The reason being that I set off alone, met different people at different times and had a different interaction that walking with someone. since then, I have always gone alone and resisted requests from people to accompany me. I have made many friends who I am still in touch with. Another point is that people who say they will come do not always realise what is involved and I have seen people go home part way through abandoning the person they were accompanying. There is nothing wrong with going alone you will have a great time.
Buen Camino
Vince

 

[Tommy Brown]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

I'm the same

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

I'm just the same,it's not unusual, relaxe

 

[Bernie Brunino]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

I

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

I’ve done 3 Camino’s on my own for the same reasons. I’ve met other pilgrims along the way - which was a nice break but I always leave myself the option to break away whenever I like. Enjoy.

 

[Caomhin O Fearghaill]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

 

[Bjarne Rasmussen]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

I to walk on my own, and at times when I feel like and there is someone I join up with others.
So I your not the only one doing the camino on your own, on the other Camino's I've done I have met both single walking persons and people who walked in groups af different sizes.
Do as you feel like, that's what I'm doing anyway.
Buen camino.

 

[Caomhin O Fearghaill]

I recommend that you walk alone....for all the reasons you have outlined...Buen Camino!

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

 

[Sherpa47]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

I walked the Camino alone in 2008. It was amazing! Also I meet and made so many Camino friends along the way. I found most pilgrims were quite happy when I said I now wish to walk alone.
In 2017 I walked it with my brother in law…. equally amazing!

 

[tpmchugh]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

Perfectly normal. On my first, my son came with me for the first two weeks then on I went on my own. On 4 subsequent trips, I walked on my own, well, I started on my own but never walked into Santiago on my own. I always met someone who I was happy walking with but never to the point that we kept each other back. Always knew where we planned to stop and met up there most of the time but if we missed each other we always met up again eventually. On one occasion a peregrino approached me and asked if I was Bob's friend. He had a message to say he was staying somewhere else and would I like to join him. Its just the way it works out. I never met anyone who finished on their own. So go, do your own thing and just let whats going to happen, happen. Enjoy the moment, make no rules for yourself and just remember to bid everyone Buen Camino. Dont get upset if they dont respond cause they have earphones in. Just walk, be yourself and be happy

 

[TrvlDad1]

I knew nothing about contrails till I spent the night in the lovely albergue in Arrés on the Aragonés, where the hospitalero took us all to a great viewing spot for the sunset and proceeded to tell us all about them. Maybe people who believe in contrails are drawn to the Camino. Sorry, off-topic, I know.

BTW, I got a tip from an iconic Camino forum member, who advises that the best way to keep people from bothering you when you are walking is to carry rosary beads and mumble to yourself.

I love to walk alone and watch the contrails on a clear day. And they come in many nationalities...this one west of Sarria in 2017 is obviously Scottish.

 

[Andorinha]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

Lots of people walk alone, I did in Spring 2019. I loved it and you make "walking buddies" along the way if you wish to. It is perfect. Here in the USA it seems weird to say you will alone, but once on the Camino you see it is rather normal. Have a great Camino.

 

[TrvlDad1]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

Thak you Viva, your post struck a nerve in me. This is my post from last year, which I went back to read again when I saw your post:
I've walked many treks/caminos over the years, rarely with anyone. As I have posted before (and apologize for repeating), what I believe to be my last "group" trek/camino was 2019 on the CP with two dear friends. We got along great, enjoyed the camino, but something was missing for me. I swore after that trip that whatever trips I have left will be alone. Friends are for touring, socializing, playing bridge, etc., etc. And those life events are wonderful and meaningful. But my caminos are very personal and will be done alone, with of course, those pilgrims I am lucky enough to meet along the way.
Buen Camino, Viva, however you chose to do it!

 

[cbacino]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

I agree. I prefer walking solo.

 

[elizason]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

When I want to walk solo and another joins me, I simply say , "I'll let you walk ahead, I want to walk solo today , enjoy your walk.
Directness is OK

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

 

[annangulo]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

I walked it alone and loved it. I would say that about 50% of the pilgrims were alone.

 

[Kevin Malinak]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

Selfish? no way, just smart... if I ever am able to walk the Camino again(I refuse to get the jab), I will be more than willing to "travel to/from" the Camino with 1 or more people, but the walking part is much best being solo(ish). With the knowledge that we would most certainly be bumping into each other lots of times during the walking.

 

[Vince1958]

I would absolutely and positively encourage a solo Camino. I’ve walked with people and I’ve walked alone. I much prefer my own company; I walk at a speed I like, I stop when I want, I take a rest day if/when I feel like it. Luxury!

 

[MichelleElynHogan]

Walk alone. That is what I prefer as well...for the most part. Many do not understand us Lone Wolves.

 

[Aloha From Kauai]

My first Camino was solo. One friend really wanted to go with me and I said no with the reason that it would become "our" trip instead of mine. I met many people, walked with some, walked alone but the best part was walking at my own pace. You will find that most pilgrims "get it" when it comes to how you wish to do your Camino. I have walked two more Caminos, one with a couple and one with a friend. All were good. Enjoy
Buen Camino

Well put.
One of the first books I read was " Grandma's on the Camino" I was taken with her conversation with her husband (wishing mine would go similarly but knowing it wouldn't), her three-part writing style to each chapter, and her commitment to walking alone. She was in her late 70s I believe at the time. I have held on, even through my occasional anxiety attacks as the date gets closer, that if I go with someone else I am honor-bound to their health and safety, getting them home if they run afoul of an illness or injury, etc. My trip would become an extension of being extra diligent on someone else's behalf that I'm trying to put aside for this trip. It is a little scary at the thought of being so far away from those I love, especially at this time, but I'm holding fast. Excitement still is winning over anxiety, and I hope everyone finds the strength or support to do their Camino in the way they want or need to.

 

[Stivandrer]

it is also a strength:
Say to yourself - I am doing this alone - together with all you other good people

inclusion of others is always always an option to be chosen

 

[topazy]

100% agree with your post. Going alone means you can walk with whoever you want, meet many different kind souls, and have your own journey. You'll never be alone on the Camino if you are open to welcoming different people to your journey. It's also so lovely getting to see familiar faces as you keep going city to city--sometimes surprisingly reuniting later with someone you talked to weeks ago and saying hi like old friends. It's a great time.

 

[parttime pilgrim]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

In 2012 after retiring my buddy and I had planned to walk the Camino Frances. All was falling into place, our respective wives were fully supportive and we were good to go in 2014.A few weeks prior to departure my buddy had to cancel his trip and my wife urged me to go on my own. Go on your own, she said you will have a different Camino and maybe a better Camino. She could not have been more right. Walking on your own gives you much more independence , you are a free spirit in that you do not have to agree any action with someone else. You can walk solo or walk with others who may be interesting or not. One thing that you must be prepared to do is to chat with complete strangers if you want company and also to read the signs if they do not want company and that's fine too..One thing that amused me was sometimes you might meet someone in an albergue who might be slightly aloof and meet them a few days later and you are greeted like a long lost brother.I walked with so many different people , young and old and have many great memories from that journey.I did walk it again in 2017 with my pal and that was equally enjoyable but different.

 

[David]

To any who thought my "go alone, go alone, go alone!" post was too strong I thought I would try to explain, from my perspective. I have walked alone and also with a good friend. Have enjoyed both equally but in very different ways.

It is like this. There is pilgrimage and there is Camino, and they are different.

A pilgrimage is the same mindset and intent as going to a retreat in a monastery or convent.
You go alone.
First thing they do is to take all your communication devices away.
This is how it is supposed to be - no distractions, just you, universe, God (or whatever name you wish to use).
You will meet and sometimes become friends with monks/nuns, have sometimes joyful mealtimes, but will spend a lot of time totally alone, even during the services you will be alone.
The only differences between a religious retreat and a pilgrimage is that in Spain you will not have a spiritual guide with you and you will probably walk 500 miles

A Camino is going on the pilgrim route and moving towards Santiago. If it doesn't have a deep spiritual element then technically it is a hike, a holiday, tourism.
On a Camino you can go with whomever you want, alone or with others. Use your phone, take a laptop or pad and write blogs and send photos of the meals you are eating, stick earbuds in and listen to songs, etc.

So it is about intent.

Neither is superior to the other, they both have value, both can be visited by synchronicity, the breath of the Spirit, all are called - though I would lean towards pilgrimage as it is a Roman Catholic pilgrim route to the remains of a saint, not a hiking holiday. Therefore my statement - Go Alone.

For most pilgrims this may be the only time they have been alone in their whole lives. Childhood, school, college, work, girl/boyfriends, marriage, children, family again - never ever alone, for decades and decades - so this, for anyone reading this and being afraid about the newness of actually being alone - be not afraid, all is well, go alone xx

Buen Camino all.

 

[Mickblack]

Before I made my first Camino I met a veteran peregrino , an ex hospitallera and a fount of knowledge. 'Three basic principles - dont set yourself a time to get to Santiago (no beginning or end), no need for maps or guides and most important, do it alone. Walking in a group effectively builds a wall around that group. Walking alone leaves you open to everybody but you will find that although you are not part of a group you will never be alone'. Too many uncertainties you might think but as he said 'the Angels will look after you'. It works for me and I'm naturally gregarious.

 

[fredlarge]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

Having walked the Frances on two occasions with and without a walking partner, I find your attitude in complete harmony with the spirit of the Camino. I think you have hit on the key element of a successful Camino, that would be long periods of solitude and short burst of companionship. For me the Camino was a block of time of solitary reflection and respite which is hard to come by in this time of mass communication, constant bombarment of information and familial responsibilities. I say carry on with your walking plans and enjoy your Camino. P.S. May-June is a perfect time to walk the Camino. Thoughts from another grumpy old man. Buen Camino

 

[CatPhillips]

My motto, paraphrasing George Thorogood and the Destroyers: When I walk alone, I prefer to be by myself.

 

[FeatherG]

Absolutely nothing wrong with walking alone, you will get enough company at your daily destination. There are those who recharge in others company, extroverts, and those who recharge alone, introverts and there is nothing wrong with either sort.

By the way you don't want to walk with this lady:

Jane from California

I am at peace enjoying the solitude, a warm day and a gentle pace. No hurry, it’s a short stage, a day to enjoy and savour. Then, suddenly, Jane from California appears. She matches my pace and starts to talk about “the deep state” followed by the “dangers of contrails”, “microwaves”, “fake vaccinations”, “fake moon landings’, the “Kennedy assassination conspiracy”. The tedium increases, I speed up, she matches me still talking, unstoppable, relentless. I stop for a pee, she waits. I slow down, she slows down. How do I loose her and regain my day? She moves seamlessly to the “Illuminati” followed by “UFO’s” and what she calls “the Roswell Conspiracy” and on and on. Prattling and babbIing she does not stop. What the hell do I do now? A village comes and goes, no chance enjoy it. The next appears, it has a bar and I need coffee. Outside the bar is Alice, a friend of Jane’s. Someone help me here there could be two of them now. Much Hi’ing, much hugging, much cheek kissing and she stops to talk with Alice. Thank you God. I walk on as fast as possible, desperate for coffee, find a bar off the route and hide. The camino has given me another lesson.

Oh @Stroller you need to stop being so polite & enjoy Your Camino. Next time you meet Jane or any or her cronies, look her straight in the eye, & in your best Irish accent say "pog me thoin" (pronounced poog me hone) which translates to "kiss my ass"! She probably won't have a clue what you're saying, but if the 'luck o' the Irish' is with ye, she'll buzz off! ☘

 

[Jeff Crawley]

Absolutely nothing wrong with walking alone, you will get enough company at your daily destination. There are those who recharge in others company, extroverts, and those who recharge alone, introverts and there is nothing wrong with either sort.

By the way you don't want to walk with this lady:

Jane from California

I am at peace enjoying the solitude, a warm day and a gentle pace. No hurry, it’s a short stage, a day to enjoy and savour. Then, suddenly, Jane from California appears. She matches my pace and starts to talk about “the deep state” followed by the “dangers of contrails”, “microwaves”, “fake vaccinations”, “fake moon landings’, the “Kennedy assassination conspiracy”. The tedium increases, I speed up, she matches me still talking, unstoppable, relentless. I stop for a pee, she waits. I slow down, she slows down. How do I loose her and regain my day? She moves seamlessly to the “Illuminati” followed by “UFO’s” and what she calls “the Roswell Conspiracy” and on and on. Prattling and babbIing she does not stop. What the hell do I do now? A village comes and goes, no chance enjoy it. The next appears, it has a bar and I need coffee. Outside the bar is Alice, a friend of Jane’s. Someone help me here there could be two of them now. Much Hi’ing, much hugging, much cheek kissing and she stops to talk with Alice. Thank you God. I walk on as fast as possible, desperate for coffee, find a bar off the route and hide. The camino has given me another lesson.

I shook off a dog that tried to attach itself to me in Villafranca by walking into an ironmongers through one door and leaving through another on a different street . . .

 

[Gingerseed]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

The best gift you can give yourself is to follow your heart and March to the beat of your own drum. Stop when you want, go the extra little bit if you feel up to it. You aren’t be selfish at all. You are honouring yourself. Have an amazing Camino!

 

[Jilly123]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

I'm respectfully wondering why this is even a question. The Camino is about YOUR walk...do it your way, be as selfish as you want, doesn't matter one bit what others think, as long as you treat them with respect in passing. This forum is incredibly useful but the flip side is that the true spirit of the Camino gets lost in all the questions and answers. Go with questions and enjoy finding your own answers or finding no answers at all.

 

[FeatherG]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

I have done big group, small group, bestie, partner, solo ... I did solo 3 times! Now, my journeys were just one week stints, but a week can feel like a month if you're not enjoying it! The big group was my first Camino experience & I loved it! The small group was my second Camino experience; & it was so enjoyable! The bestie was my third Camino experience & it was hilarious! I did my 4th, 5th & 6th Caminos, solo - indescribable & so like no 'trip' I've ever had before; especially the 6th, which was in memory of my Dad & though I had some 'hairy, early, dark mornings', He was especially with me then & we had some laughs! The 7th was with my hubby, who just had to see what was 'pulling me to Spain for a week every summer'! He really enjoyed it, but couldn't keep up with my pace at times & we'd laugh about that every evening, as he bandaged his feet & I sipped vino tinto! The Camino will be whatever you want it to be. Don't have any expectations; listen to your body, & definitely go solo!

 

[Pilgrim9]

Absolutely nothing wrong with walking alone, you will get enough company at your daily destination. There are those who recharge in others company, extroverts, and those who recharge alone, introverts and there is nothing wrong with either sort.

By the way you don't want to walk with this lady:

Jane from California

I am at peace enjoying the solitude, a warm day and a gentle pace. No hurry, it’s a short stage, a day to enjoy and savour. Then, suddenly, Jane from California appears. She matches my pace and starts to talk about “the deep state” followed by the “dangers of contrails”, “microwaves”, “fake vaccinations”, “fake moon landings’, the “Kennedy assassination conspiracy”. The tedium increases, I speed up, she matches me still talking, unstoppable, relentless. I stop for a pee, she waits. I slow down, she slows down. How do I loose her and regain my day? She moves seamlessly to the “Illuminati” followed by “UFO’s” and what she calls “the Roswell Conspiracy” and on and on. Prattling and babbIing she does not stop. What the hell do I do now? A village comes and goes, no chance enjoy it. The next appears, it has a bar and I need coffee. Outside the bar is Alice, a friend of Jane’s. Someone help me here there could be two of them now. Much Hi’ing, much hugging, much cheek kissing and she stops to talk with Alice. Thank you God. I walk on as fast as possible, desperate for coffee, find a bar off the route and hide. The camino has given me another lesson.

A very good and amusing story about a painful experience.

Perhaps essential pre-learned Camino phrases should include "No hablo inglés", "Ich spreche kein Englisch", "Je ne parle pas anglais", etc., or, more universally, sign language to the effect that one is a deaf mute.

Or, just start asking the new "friend" to loan you a few hundred Euros to help you get by until next week. Be persistent.

 

[EL LECHERO]

I'm planning on doing the Frances in May-June and have told numerous people of my plans. I've had several people offer to go with me. Some find it odd that I would go by myself. However, I want to walk at my own pace, stop when I want to stop, stay where I want to stay. Am I being selfish? While walking I'm content to walk with someone else 25% of the time but the rest of the time I prefer to walk solo. Once reaching my destination or even stopping for a break I love socializing, so I'm not a grumpy old man, well maybe old Anybody else feel the same?

I walked from Astorga to Santiago in 2016 with my wife. We had a great time. But we only stayed in an Albergue once and the rest stayed in Pensions. It was cheaper and more convenient. But I was a faster walker and and had to slow down for her and we had to compromise about a lot of things. This year I'm taking 15 days to walk from Pamplona to where ever that may take me. She has given me her blessing and is watching our 4 yr old son. So I get to stop and start and sleep where I want too. I have a little guilt but she has said I am more vested in the Camino than her. I like being a minimalist and challenged with the obstacles the Camino provides........I leave March 27th....and getting a little nervous..

 

[Lexicos]

Nah, do it your way.
Isn’t that the whole point of a Camino?
Given present circumstances I’d go solo or with a bus load of pilgrims.
I’d be happy enough just to be there.

 

[FourSeasons]

Walking a Camino alone, for me, is the way to go. Heck I don’t have anyone from home asking to go with me, they all think I’m crazy for doing it in the first place.

Even though I go solo there were a few times I walked with someone for part of a day and those days were definitely longer than they should have been.

There was one day (my birthday) that another pilgrim walked with me the entire day. It turned out to be a long one and I appreciated and enjoyed their company very much. Then on my last Camino there was another day I walked the entire day with someone and fully enjoyed it. That’s it, only two days out of my three Camino’s where I had company all day.
I’ve never felt I was being selfish for going it alone.

This song lyric sums it up for me.
… Here I go again on my own
Goin' down the only road I've ever known
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone…

 

[Robo]

Do I get a sense that walking alone seems to be the preference for many ?

Never seen so much furious agreement

.....

 

[FeatherG]

A very good and amusing story about a painful experience.

Perhaps essential pre-learned Camino phrases should include "No hablo inglés", "Ich spreche kein Englisch", "Je ne parle pas anglais", etc., or, more universally, sign language to the effect that one is a deaf mute.

Or, just start asking the new "friend" to loan you a few hundred Euros to help you get by until next week. Be persistent.

The voice of experience ... love it!

 

[FeatherG]

I shook off a dog that tried to attach itself to me in Villafranca by walking into an ironmongers through one door and leaving through another on a different street . . .

This is so good (tho I love dogs, but on Camino, there are varying 'species'!) Maybe time to write the book Jeff ... 'Tails of the Unexpected ... on Camino'!

 

[Jeff Crawley]

This is so good (tho I love dogs, but on Camino, there are varying 'species'!) Maybe time to write the book Jeff ... 'Tails of the Unexpected ... on Camino'!

I see what you did there

It was a nice enough mutt


but I didn't want to be tailed all across Spain!